This is my first post on this blog, And i am going to tell you why i decide to write this blog.
This blog is specifically about me, my life, my journey...I will sometimes write small things about my family.
I am a woman, as i am writing this post i am 35 years old, single mom with three children! Two handsome, intelligent sons aged 11 and 10 and a beautiful sweet girl of 14 months. I am blessed that i have them. My first two sons are from my previous marriage, a failed marriage which left me ANGRY, rather than broken. Unfortunately, i do not know why i got married in the first place, because i was on my early 20's, in college, met this handsome guy, got pregnant and even before i knew it, Baaaaam... im pregnant. Learning from my sisters experience who had a baby before marriage and the trauma she went through, i decided to leave with this guy in 2004, had my first son the same year, conceived again when he was 4 months, married in a church in 2005, had my second son the same year and separated in 2006. it was a series of events like in a movie and looking myself now, i cant believe that this was so very me!
I met another guy in 2009 and had a relationship, on and off until i moved in the same city where he lived, conceived in 2013 and had my girl in 2013. The pregnancy took a toll on me and couldn't keep this relationship either, so i had to let it go. To be frank the ending of this relationship did hurt me. it left a hole deep down in me that i have been finding a way to fill it. A very deep dark hole that i started filling it with food and drink, and meaningless relationships, and all kind of actions that would make me excited. And i confused excitement with happiness.
I gained weight, and hated my body, spent my money in things i would regret later, lost my friends because i was ashamed, blame my fate because i didn't know what i really wanted and how to get there, depressed and angry all the time.
For some reasons, i decided i wanted to change things around me. So i decided to read, all the inspirational books and articles and lines i could get and slowly, i started with small action. example, i changed the direction of my bed... and it changed a lot how i viewed my life!
It is a journey, a very long journey with lots of ups and down but i now i will get there. I have few friends, co workers, and a very sweet neighbor. i am still rebuilding and reconnecting with people i lost, and make plans to make my life better! Welcome and travel with me! i hope you will enjoy reading!
This blog is specifically about me, my life, my journey...I will sometimes write small things about my family.
I am a woman, as i am writing this post i am 35 years old, single mom with three children! Two handsome, intelligent sons aged 11 and 10 and a beautiful sweet girl of 14 months. I am blessed that i have them. My first two sons are from my previous marriage, a failed marriage which left me ANGRY, rather than broken. Unfortunately, i do not know why i got married in the first place, because i was on my early 20's, in college, met this handsome guy, got pregnant and even before i knew it, Baaaaam... im pregnant. Learning from my sisters experience who had a baby before marriage and the trauma she went through, i decided to leave with this guy in 2004, had my first son the same year, conceived again when he was 4 months, married in a church in 2005, had my second son the same year and separated in 2006. it was a series of events like in a movie and looking myself now, i cant believe that this was so very me!
I met another guy in 2009 and had a relationship, on and off until i moved in the same city where he lived, conceived in 2013 and had my girl in 2013. The pregnancy took a toll on me and couldn't keep this relationship either, so i had to let it go. To be frank the ending of this relationship did hurt me. it left a hole deep down in me that i have been finding a way to fill it. A very deep dark hole that i started filling it with food and drink, and meaningless relationships, and all kind of actions that would make me excited. And i confused excitement with happiness.
I gained weight, and hated my body, spent my money in things i would regret later, lost my friends because i was ashamed, blame my fate because i didn't know what i really wanted and how to get there, depressed and angry all the time.
For some reasons, i decided i wanted to change things around me. So i decided to read, all the inspirational books and articles and lines i could get and slowly, i started with small action. example, i changed the direction of my bed... and it changed a lot how i viewed my life!
It is a journey, a very long journey with lots of ups and down but i now i will get there. I have few friends, co workers, and a very sweet neighbor. i am still rebuilding and reconnecting with people i lost, and make plans to make my life better! Welcome and travel with me! i hope you will enjoy reading!
No comments:
Post a Comment