When i was a young girl, i wanted to be a doctor, because my mom got sick and i wanted to help her. I ended up studying law, and work on NGOs both local and international without practicing law a single day in my working life and still wonder how can life take a total different direction from what you sometime plan.
My outlook in life is improving, i am trying to look at life more positively but not naive, trust people and enjoy each moment i have in life. I try to remind myself constantly who i am and and what good i have done in this world. Trust me, it is not easy. And as a struggle to reminding myself who i am, and my worth plus sharing my moment and connecting with others, that is why i started this blog. It is a place to share my emotions and experience with other.. i may not have a lot to teach people, but i have enough for people to learn from me. i am trying to leave what i am putting here in public.
I am not philosophical about life, but i understand it in a simplest way i can leave and share with other. To me, life is a moment, whether good or bad, but a lesson that is priceless.. I used to think, a good life is having everything you want, from material point of view. I am in transformation to change this thinking, because that is what i was taught. You have to go to school, get good grades, and get a good job. I am still taking stock of what i have not in terms of material possession, but the priceless little things that put meaning in my life.
I used to be ashamed that i don't have a good car, beautiful house, stable marriage and money to buy everything i wanted for me and my children. i used to stay away from school mates who had all those materials, and when i met them accidentally, i would lie that my car was broken that is why i was taking a taxi or public transport, or i would lie that i had a house in another town, but all these were because i wanted to look like them. Until when i found out that some of my friends had rocky marriages, others had married men for boyfriends, others had debts way over their heads and they weren't completely 100% happy as i thought.
My learning from this experience, no matter how and who you are, (1) there is something about you that others don't have. They are dying to have what you have. Example, on my case, although i do not have a marriage and i am living single, others are dying to have my independence and free-ness. (2) Looking at life positively, does'nt mean that you accept everything and let yourself taken for granted, but the understanding that others have their own way of looking at life and at some point you need to let them be!
My outlook in life is improving, i am trying to look at life more positively but not naive, trust people and enjoy each moment i have in life. I try to remind myself constantly who i am and and what good i have done in this world. Trust me, it is not easy. And as a struggle to reminding myself who i am, and my worth plus sharing my moment and connecting with others, that is why i started this blog. It is a place to share my emotions and experience with other.. i may not have a lot to teach people, but i have enough for people to learn from me. i am trying to leave what i am putting here in public.
I am not philosophical about life, but i understand it in a simplest way i can leave and share with other. To me, life is a moment, whether good or bad, but a lesson that is priceless.. I used to think, a good life is having everything you want, from material point of view. I am in transformation to change this thinking, because that is what i was taught. You have to go to school, get good grades, and get a good job. I am still taking stock of what i have not in terms of material possession, but the priceless little things that put meaning in my life.
I used to be ashamed that i don't have a good car, beautiful house, stable marriage and money to buy everything i wanted for me and my children. i used to stay away from school mates who had all those materials, and when i met them accidentally, i would lie that my car was broken that is why i was taking a taxi or public transport, or i would lie that i had a house in another town, but all these were because i wanted to look like them. Until when i found out that some of my friends had rocky marriages, others had married men for boyfriends, others had debts way over their heads and they weren't completely 100% happy as i thought.
My learning from this experience, no matter how and who you are, (1) there is something about you that others don't have. They are dying to have what you have. Example, on my case, although i do not have a marriage and i am living single, others are dying to have my independence and free-ness. (2) Looking at life positively, does'nt mean that you accept everything and let yourself taken for granted, but the understanding that others have their own way of looking at life and at some point you need to let them be!
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