The other day my son came back home from school , crying, with his buttocks red and raised because of the beating from his teacher. He was so sore and swollen that he could barely stand straight leave alone sitting down. I could hardily contain my anger against whoever did that and i started ranting. I asked him what happened and said his teacher beat him and others because they talked about lady parts in the school bus on the way back home. I was stunned with the level of stupidity and ignorance his teacher portrayed. I immediately called the school and asked to speak to the director and principal and whoever was there and threatened to bring them my son so that he can be sent to the hospital. The next morning i decided to get there early to give them a piece of my mind first on them beating my baby and what and how i talk with my pre-teen boys about sex and sexuality.
I am a single parent, a mother and i am raising three children, two of them boys of 11 and 12 years old. They are at the age where they are fascinated with sex and women bodies and i decided that i would approach the matter openly and honestly. So every week i would make sure i choose a topic we would discuss and the first question would be something like, " So.... tell me, what are your friends say about women menstruation for example" This would happen in a very informal setting such as while we are in the car, or cleaning, or in the kitchen. And they would tell me mostly what they have heard, and read and ask me what is it, i get an opportunity to set the information straight, and voila, no one is embarrassed or offended!
Now the other day, my son was trying to explain to his friend that women actually do have the private parts of their own and that they do use them to bring babies in the world and that for that to happen women have to go through menstruation period as part of the process. Actually, this is part of the information i shared with my sons. I also stressed out that, our culture pretty much prohibits people to talk about private parts publicly, but it is okay to talk about it if you are informing your friend about it. We actually developed code name for the parts so that if they don't feel comfortable, they may use the code name instead. I insisted that the words should never ever used to offend another one because i would be very angry... So the learning was clear.
Back to the teachers and school, the kind of information they impart on our children's young minds are those of shame, hate, and kind of scary. They approach it in a way that sex is dirty and bad and is good and nice at the same time because it gives us babies. The one question that my son once asked his teacher is, if sex was bad, why does he have a wife. To the best of his knowledge, married couples do have sex. The teacher said its bad for young children. And he corrected him by saying, then you should not say sex is bad, but the outcome of irresponsible sex for young children is bad. He said teachers should never criminalize sex but instead should teach children how to grow up and become responsible adults towards sex. In schools, teachers should also teach the kids the life skills so that children make responsible decisions when it comes to sex..... and this particular teacher did hold grudges against my son.
To teachers: Please do not confuse our children. Do not throw books on their face and ask them to read page so and so about reproductive health and never talk about it anymore or hold an honest discussion without whopping their assess.
To Parents: As much as we have the easiest way out of buying computers and pay for internet services, a word of mouth is still as much as useful. internet provide all sort of false information. Who knows. The other day my son told me that he saw a porn video in the school computer and who knows what else is there...
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