Well. most people will not understand the struggles of single mothers who are trying to get it right especially if she is seen well off on the outside. I am telling you, it is the daily roller coaster. The mood may change from very happy because your baby scored a goal in the school match to the very sad because of several other reason. Here are 10 daily struggle of single mothers
1. Balancing Work and family life: We all agree that to most single mothers who are taking care of their children 100% without any financial support, giving your best at work so as to keep it is not a subject of negotiation. You come home late, tired. All you want is take off your shoes, and snap that bra through the blouse sleeves, sway it across the room and collapse on the couch to watch news with hot delicious dinner and glass of wine or juice in front of you You may think of a feet massage a little bit as well!. But the moment you step in your house, the dinner, washing, homework cleaning , crying etc etc is waiting for you. Well, kind of being there since morning!
2. Which bill to pay first: There are school fees, utilities, rent, fuel (if you happen to have a car), food, clothes, medical, books, school trip, dentist...... In most cases money comes in through one window (your salary or income) and you have to prioritize which one comes first.
3. Juggling between hospital, dentist, school match to community gathering, family needs and official meetings. Have you ever wished that you could divide yourself in two or three or even five so as to do all the necessary? Tell me about it... i have been there!
4. Being both a prosecutor, judge and Jury! This occurs mostly when you are too tired to even brush your hair and you are taking up that five minutes power nap because your toddler is sleeping while the older ones are doing their home works or playing and the fight breaks.. (trying to paint a picture here) and you want to do it as fast as possible so that you can go back to your sleep. And you become a judge jury and prosecutor all at once while trying not to feel guilty!
5. Dating a new guy Vs your children welfare: Heads up guys: If you are dating a single mom, you should know that you are dating her and her child/children. No mother in a right state of mind would ever want a guy who does not love her kids. The constant fear and doubts whether your children will like him, or whether he will like your kids or whether they will get along well.. .. is really really exhausting: No wonder single mothers stay single for as long as it takes
6. Will your kids turn out right? No mother would like to see her kids end up in prison, or becomes and addict or of bad behavior. Every mother (at least most of us) dreams of raising the next Barrack Obama or Oprah. Intelligent, successful, influential; It is our dream. The constant fear of how our children will turn up eats our guts everyday.
7. How does the Society look at me: Well, this is for those who cannot leave without an approval of others. The thinking that how does society look up at single mothers and treat them can be daunting. The bottom line question is "How did she end up a single mother? why doesn't she have a man in her life"? This puts a pressure on single moms to act in a certain way! Trust me i have seen women change from one personality to another in a blink of an eye because they could not take up the pressure.
8. The well being and safety of our children: . Have you ever panicked because a principle in your baby's school called you because of your child. This is one phone call in my life i am scared off because you do not know what happened when they are at school. Or anywhere else! it does not stop.
9.Financial Security: You may agree with me or not but to most people this is one of the biggest questing and fear. The fear itself is a struggle and everyday you try to think of something new to keep your lives afloat.
10. Finding a new partner: Well, this may not be in our daily list of struggles but it comes up sometime. If you are not in relationship, there is this effort, that comes from somewhere that one day you will find your other half. Be in church, at work, on the road... and you never stop looking!
I do not have solution for this but if you can share few tips on how you manage this.. feel free to drop them on the comments box
Big up to all single mothers out there! You rock the world!
No comments:
Post a Comment